Remember

Coffee and Regrets-Slam(sburg) Poetry

Remember

Remember when I came into your life

I know you had plans-dreams even

And then- there I was

A real human person

Remember before it got bad

You seemed to enjoy being with me, talking with me, teaching me

The long car rides to the Jersey shore-Days on the beach-And the nights?

You showed me boardwalk French fries- funnel cake covered in powdered sugar- waffles and ice cream

You’re the only person I ever went on rides with

Remember

Remember how you showed me what music was?

On those long car rides-

At home listening to records-

A rainy afternoon and your Beatles collection

You took me to see The Temptations and The O’jays

And no one could dance like you- The jitterbug-the twist-the mashed potato-God I loved to watch you dance

With you-I could be myself

I didn’t have to be good at football-It didn’t matter to you like it did with everyone else

I didn’t have to explain why I came home with a black eye–

You just wrapped up a dish towel with ice and handed it to me

Remember

Remember how you told me those guys on the corner were gonna grow up to be losers-

But that they probably weren’t gonna grow up at all

Because they were gonna die young

And you were right about that

Yeah, you were right a lot

Remember

Remember when we moved into that first house-

Waiting for furniture-Before the lights were on-We ate cold burgers and hot dogs by the light of a flashlight-Like camping out in the biggest place I’d ever seen-We slept on the floor in the cold and the dark-But I didn’t care because you were there

To me-You might as well have created the whole world-

Because you sure were my guide

Together-You and me-We lived inside a bubble

But I could always sense there was something eating away at your insides

I don’t know what it was-

Maybe it was those hopes-those dreams you had

Before I came along

Before there was another-

Another person to consider-

Another who got sick some times-

Another who wanted to watch cowboy movies-

Another who played Kiss on your turntable rather than Simon and Garfunkel

I guess it was just your bubble-

And one day-that bubble burst

Remember

Remember the first time I disappointed you-It had something to do with those guys on the corner-didn’t it

I remember- Funny, because with those guys I did have to explain why I had a black eye-don’t worry I didn’t tell them it was you

And if I was gonna be on the outside of the bubble-I was gonna stay outside-And I was gonna do it big-Like front page of the paper big

I was gonna turn your disappointment to embarrassment- And I guess I did a pretty good job of it

I know why you won’t talk to me

Remember

Remember declining the collect calls from a correctional institution

The letters I wrote-Did you ever read them-I wonder if you still have them

I spent years trying to prove I didn’t care-To mash down the rejection-The humiliation

I tried to drink the oceans dry

The entire Gross National Product of several South American countries went into my veins

But no matter how much I hurt myself- I could never get to you

I crawled on my belly over miles of broken glass- Just to see you on the horizon breaking bottles

Every person I’ve ever been close to has been hurt-

Because in one way or another they are always you to me-

And I wonder if you know that-But something tells me you don’t

Remember

Remember all the times I called on your birthday and you wouldn’t come to the phone

Well, maybe I’ll try again this August-

I want to tell you how much better things are-

I want to tell you we can forget all the years that have passed-

That it’s not too late to start again-

Let’s go back down the shore and have slices of Mack’s pizza

I’ll ring that bell with a sledgehammer and win you a stuffed animal-

I mean fuck it-we’re too old to hold grudges

Yeah I think that’s what I’ll do-

I’ll just call you up and say hey it’s me-

Your son

Remember